07.23.2010
01.16.2011 replaced broken link
Desperate Darth Vader Robs New York Bank
original article written by Net Advisor™
LONG ISLAND, New York. Police say man dressed up as Darth Vader robbed a Setauket Chase Bank branch in Long Island July 22, 2010 (Sources: Reuters/ ABC News Video).
The Sith Lord was not caring his lightsaber. This time, he was armed only with a hand gun, something cruder than a good ‘ol blaster at your side.
The Force was with him as he reportedly pushed a man down to the ground. Rumors have it that Vader told the man that Vader “felt him” as he walked in the bank. Vader then confronted the bank teller and demanded money. When she resisted, rumors have it that Vader told her that he, “found her lack of faith disturbing.”
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Photo Credit: (AP/Suffolk County Police Department)
Other unconfirmed reports say that Vader’s new Death Star was seriously behind in payments when in a long time ago, in a galaxy, far, far, away, the Rebellion helped the lender foreclose on the space station by firing torpedoes into a small thermal exhaust chamber about 2 meters wide. Vader was found spinning around in a damaged tie-fighter for some time, and has sought revenge ever since.
An old friend of Darth Vader, named Obi-One was interviewed and said, “Vader was seduced by the Dark Side.”
Vader’s son, Luke Skywalker was also interviewed after the incident. Luke said he could “still feel the good in him,” and despite disbelief by his twin sister Leia, Luke said he could help his father be good again.
Luke, who became a Jedi soon after confronting his abusive father also said,
“Dad had some tough times growing up, and was never the same after mom was attacked by the Tusken Raiders (also known as “the Sand People”). Dad ended up going down a path that my mom, Padmé, just could not follow.”
— Luke Skywalker (son of Darth Vader)
Police and state troopers are still investigating.
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images credit: AP/Suffolk County Police Department
Copyright © 2010 Net Advisor™
Story filed under “Light Humor” due to satire play on news story. The actual event was probably not funny to those involved.
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